The Bleaker Sex Indeed

The op-eds in Sunday’s New York Times drew some conclusions that, as a woman overall, left me quite unsettled.

An article entitled “The Bleaker Sex,” written by Frank Bruni, analyzes the upcoming HBO series “Girls” and compares it to the modern woman’s failed attempt to maintain a Don Draper-esque sex life: all pleasure, all detachment. In the sex scene he highlights, he notes the female “hero” is portrayed as having no say in her sexual encounter, choosing to accommodate her partner at her expense rather than striving for mutual satisfaction.

Furthermore, he posits that the 24-hour porn cycle has raised the expectations of men that mere mortal women are unable to fulfill and has pushed the idea that women are to remain silent partners when it comes to sex. I would imagine that this idea would spill over into other aspects of life as well.

I have to admit that Bruni has a point. I have to agree that pornography has had a major effect on how people are becoming less able to separate these sexual fantasies from reality thus contributing to the sexual devolution of society, which is a huge disservice to everyone, but for sure affects women negatively.  What I don’t agree with is the implication that men are more capable than women in having casual sexual encounters and that casual sexual encounters have become the ideal. Just as I believe women are more than capable of sexual detachment, I also believe that men are not immune from the attachment sexual contact can bring.

What do you think? Is sexual detachment becoming the “new normal”?




Famished Fashion?

Oh come on, It’s NY Fashion Week. You knew that this was coming.

As waifish supermodels grace the runway, once again the media is raising concern about their health and whether or not the industry is to blame. I would go on a rant about this, but I’ll let the following news sources do it for me:

Learning Curve on Size is Vital to Fashion (via Herald Sun)

Eating Disorders And Fashion Are Still At Odds (via New York Daily News)

Fashion and Eating Disorders: How Much Responsibility Does Industry Have? (via Huffington Post Women)

VIDEO: Local Designer Highlights More than Fashion Week (via The Age)

Kiddie Dieting

Our young girls already have enough in the media that chip away at their self-esteem and body image. Now, an author decides to write a children’s book encouraging young girls to go on a diet.

Maggie Goes on a Diet, which hits the shelves Oct. 16, tells the story of 14-year-old Maggie who, well, goes on a diet. After shedding pounds off of her overweight frame, she becomes “normal-sized,” athletic and confident.

The book's cover depicts Maggie, age 14, fantasizing in the mirror about her ideal body. (Source:

Granted, with childhood obesity on the rise it would be wise for media to help teach our children how to eat healthfully and encourage them to participate in athletic activities. However, I have to question the ultimate impact the book will have on its audience (presumably, young girls). Its message implies that the only way a girl can be truly happy and confident is if she is of a certain dress size. In reality, while we should encourage our children to adopt  healthy lifestyle, we should be careful to not equate size to happiness, as this is the message that could be detrimental to their self-esteem well into their adult years.

Trust me. I speak from experience.

Click here to read an article on the book from Huffington Post Women.

ABC News weighed in as well; click here to read their report.

How to Talk to Little Girls

An article on Think.TV written by Lisa Bloom challenges our culture’s tendency to compliment young girls on their looks or clothes instead of their intelligence. Bloom, the author of ThinkStraight Talk for Women to Stay Smart in a Dumbed-Down World, states in the piece that asking a little girl what she is reading will do far more for her self-esteem than asking where she got her pretty dress.

Maya (right) is adorable-but, she can also read all by herself. She is five years old. (Source:

Although there is a mountain of truth in Bloom’s rationale, I think the focus should be on creating  a healthy balance between the two. Young girls should be complimented on the total package-being beautiful and smart. Too much of a good thing in any case could be detrimental.

To learn more about Lisa Bloom and "Think," click here. (Source:

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